#579 - better get a wriggle on

 

3.viii.21

579

2.214

better get a wriggle on

for godsbother

 

I went and looked up longevity

life expectancy

googled for it, for them  

perfect health, mind you

… guess I was killing time

 

approached the thing lightheartedly

very few pills each day

ping pong a bit, walking, lively conversation

 

you shouldn’t read anything into this

like going to the dentist

better late than sorry

like taxes…

 

legacy exercise

thought of making a will

(‘how long have I got doc?’)

you could almost wish the humour was darker

‘death be not proud’, ‘no dominion’

 

I fully expected the dial would show

FOREVER

or

ALL ETERNITY

 

but, mind you, they’re not the same thing

life expectancy and longevity

(little actuarial game)

 

anyway, I was feeling fine, chipper

in rude good, top of the tree

ten league boots

cheroot from the song

 

I guess I never gave it much thought

this how long is a piece of string

those three sisters, such pleasant girls

good genes and all

bit of a lark

 

and golden years?

 

having long since chosen immortality

I mean who has time for anything less?

 

picture then staring into the charts

and it’s not an experience I’d recommend

 

they put you down with the herd

in black and white

 

thing is

apparently I’m a gonner

and I think you might be the same

 

it seems like we were born a really long time ago

 

of course they do get it wrong

like that doctor who looked at my spine

thirty years back and said it was a miracle I could walk

or the quack who told dad he had a few months to go in 1950

hello!?

 

well in fact the whole thing is a miracle

the glisten tip

how it rained in the night

and there you have it

perception, consciousness, love

(words that should never appear in a poem)

… point is, how other than open ended are these?

                  are this?

why else invent the soul and the rest of that paraphernalia?

 

I see now that I never took death seriously

(and following Epicurus, why would I?...

it’s not like it’s something you’ll ever feel)

 

hybris!  guess it was head in the clouds

so long sat at that table with gods

full woolly too, even at my height

 

what to do? what to do?

 

you could go all Oblomov

sloth’s fine but it’s all temperament

to dream is no preparation

 

I think better put my back into it

shoulder to the life death wheel

 

ask – how many acts of kindness to come?

try not to say ‘this’ll see me out’

or mention a mindfuck ‘waiting room’

greyed out Elysium

 

it’s not about making a mark

or even cleaning up after yourself

(who could bear to put the toys away?)

 

it’s about finishing what you’ve begun

 

I’ll bury myself in the garden here

 

it’s only a matter of time