The Daily Kit: #231

20.viii.20

231

who am I?

(draft of tomorrow’s piece)

Man of Dust

and sheltered life

all over the place

now home

can colour in

this is all about

terrible things were done

are, will be

here’s dog licking its balls

cause you know why

indelicate, still ask

which part was where

when beat up, gaslit, simply vanished

let’s say this half that

all very gendered too

up personal, close

fist and the cringe

stand up for and

lay me down

in jackboots

shot on the banks

bastards took the shoes

so many givens

and all of this choosing

violence of was and still

the fucked up and the drug addled

never seen again

all of us scarred by fact

able as am

and ramp it up

struggling for reception

merest in mention

lock down

run out

ring fence

keep moving the borders

till the border’s gone

in fine fettle

sound of

and that’s me, now magnetized

glued to the only item

woven of skill, love, luck

dance over the keys

trip light

voices of the gone are mine

make poems out of misery

or other way around

and at a stretch (because I can)

mud in your eye as well

mind steps

I AM

15%, at least, any tree

99% chimpanzee

garden in pyjamas

semi-wog white-sliced

my father fought

one bung nostril

and where are the teeth?

I say remember

best shot we’ve got

who in the cannon?

in the classics, where I’ll see you

who will write them too?

why WE

the also undreamt

and thus far now so WOKE

the more I consider the better I think

the round model suits, don’t you?

as if the globe itself

to whom we, so long irrelevant

and soon again

except I say

animals other than we are

come into these yellow sands

time perched a shoulder

mantled me

I was winged thing then

send me vicarious

happily various

imagine a peer-over heaven

all unknown the ancestors there

a painting of the clouds inside

no one knows what’s going on

but float like the signifier then

like the dickens

jouissance!

worlds taken for truth

here we are though asking again

under a brand new erasure

up the volume

others mutter

not just me mine

together it all

or empty gesture am

then

make the creature circle bigger

one tent

no ring to rule

am I merry-go-round or got off?

moments on my own to wonder

who am I (?)

dissolve in some society

I face the fairer world towards

call judgement on this head

and then a choral instance – self

I am a leaf through orchestra

and table at the dice

drift here mists

be many headed

brilliantly excuse

am I swoon a tune?

you tell me

make white sliced monument of me

and I’ll deface myself

erase and back to the dream

tall winded

a reason called exploits

back in the Days of Dim

when no love was lost

test proved allergic to life

own largely

I hardly have a capital letter

in the ever after ask me

precious to the chase

all such words buzz

flies

over the last legs

hear the cry

‘clear! clear!?’

now I know that was a question

love’s to contradict

do dizzies in the sack

I am

you and we are

lovely

a riddle of course

only ever a draft

they’ve moved the feast again

vanished just as we’d impart

at my funeral already they’re playing

music I’ve never heard

5 to 7

from nowhere first is where having

that was 5 am

write down what I will forget

we are both joining up

not sure why

but then this is because dad did

wondering what to take

nothing at first and then upstairs

just a tick

the i-pad else a novel is lost

all for want of some kind of kit

into of course the unknown

those stairs where you remember things

like a list of steps

or the shopping

and should I take grog

and a button up shirt

what’s allowed?

where does the cutlery go?

helping Donald Trump pack up the golf course

it’s getting dark

and they’re called deer baskets

he wants me to know it’s because

whole venison is roasted in each

he’s like a father

and someone else employed there

is leaning over the edge of the pool

to say aussie oi, are you ?

tell him I missed the Olympics in

but no longer listening

we’ve a long thinking time to order

izakaya

all they can hear is

okonomi please

second draft of

'who am I?'